Drugs

We all take them

We all use them

We all need them

What extent are we ran by them?

In a world where

Technology is a demand

Are we reprogramming our brains

as we suffer from chronic

mental illnesses

that go rapid?

The alcohol user

The coffee drinker

The Adderall supplier

The SSRI takers

The pain medicine abusers

The antipsychotic users

The ptsd anxiety needers

The antihistamine poppers

How are we all different?

What makes one crackhead different from

the coffee drinker?

Aren’t they both stimulants?

What makes the SSRI user different from

the Morphine abusers or CBD smokers?

They both are depressants

In my eyes,

we’re all the same

Nothing is different

In America, none of us

use our brain.

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I send the first text:

“Look I forgive you for any and everything 

you’ve said to me and I apologize if I upset you”

 

Under the deep dark covers of my bed

engulfed in the sounds of a blue wave

I hold myself in fetal position

while holding my hands together,

prayerfully, head bowed, eyes closed

 

Inside of a cold, dark room I step,

two soft feet on chilling tiles

Slowly making my way towards you, naked

like I was in my dreams in the past week.

 

I receive,

“why”

 

I hold out my right hand to you

out of reach,

only your finger points to mine,

 

body rocks back and forth whispering

“please let me go”

 

we reach across a cold, dark room

where the windows don’t shine any light

 

“because I want to leave you on peaceful terms and let you do you

and I won’t talk to you anymore. It’s best for the both of us”

 

I whisper the soft prayer,

“please let me go”

 

and you keep breathing out

fog from your lips as the chill

of darkness holds your soul

suffocates your eyes

still pointing our fingers towards each other

 

you finally withdraw your arm

 

and my phone flashes:

“whatever”

 

I see flashing images of

Adam and God

pointing blaming fingers at each other

a famous image

staring back at me

 

Maybe, this is what it felt like

when God banned Adam

from the garden of Eden

 

The tears hold my cheek as

the feelings of despair

caresses my heart,

understanding an underworld

so tortured by

your shameless, unforgiving soul.

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